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Archive for June, 2010

NFSWednesday: something something hobbit something

Jun. 30, 2010

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Happy Not for Sale Wednesday! And now watch while I lose all Internet credibility I ever had and confess: I have not read The Hobbit, nor Lord of the Rings. I tried, I really did, but oh my god they’re boring not my style. But people I know and respect love those books, and the movies to. And people I don’t know but still think are kind of awesome seem to really have taken the message of the books — which I think is something like “stay in your little round house, it’s scary out there” — to heart.

Hobbit houses! That’s what I’m talking about. People living like hobbits. Like these people, making it our first Lovely Listing in Wales:

funny real estate - Dreams of Bag End Fulfilled!
funny real estate - Dreams of Bag End Fulfilled!

Here there be Swiss Dwell-reading hobbits:

funny real estate - Hobbits Read Dwell Too
funny real estate - Hobbits Read Dwell Too

Above-ground hobbits:

Funny Real Estate - Rose Thunderdome
Funny Real Estate - Rose Thunderdome

…and couldn’t-get-approval-from-the-planning-committe hobbits.

Loveliest comment, by wasserpig: …”Hobbit houses! That’s what I’m talking about. People living like hobbits. Like these people, making it our first Lovely Listing in Wales:”… You mean: That’s what I’m tolkien about!

Found by: Erin
funny real estate - Dreams of Bag End Fulfilled!

Found by: Cat
funny real estate - Hobbits Read Dwell Too

Found By: Nina and Lori

Funny Real Estate - Rose Thunderdome

Found by Laura

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Subterranean Secrets

Jun. 29, 2010

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funny real estate - Subterranean Secrets
funny real estate - Subterranean Secrets
funny real estate - Subterranean Secrets

Beneath its calm clapboard exterior lurks… what? I have no idea. Something well organized. Scraps of paper? Animal hides? Scarves? Is this Steve Tyler‘s house?

Found by: Joan

Loveliest comment, by LMA: Really talented, crafty weirdos go for the Steampunk treatment of their basements and home offices — you know, all brass and mahogany with random dials and gearing all over the place. To find the necessary parts you have to stalk antique shops and own several kinds of wood lathes, drill presses, and learn how to cold join. You end up with a place that’s all WTF but which impresses everyone who sees it, even if they have no interest in Victoriania or science fiction.

Here we have the opposite approach, taken by untalented weirdos who purchase all of their supplies at Michael’s and Auto Zone. It blends the color choices of the late ’80s with a truck stop aesthetic. It makes full use of doublestick tape, Ikea Allen wrenches and prefabricated industrial sheeting. It’s a style I like to call Steelnerd. Tho’ I’d prefer not to see it at all.
funny real estate - Subterranean Secrets

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Heated by the smoldering good looks of the residents

Jun. 28, 2010

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“Perfect for any sophisticated Buyer!” says the listing. Especially perfect if the buyer is all pale and moody and sparkly and got into his mom’s makeup. For yes, this is the house of the creepy stalker dreamy vampire Edward Cullen. Or it would be if he weren’t (look away, Twihards) fictional. I, of course, do not admit to familiarity with any of the books or having seen any of the movies, because I’m above all that. Anyway.

Here’s where the Cullens keep their books, which they throw at their guests in the hope of inducing paper cuts. They hang a beach towel on the wall in memory of when they last went surfing.

Here’s the kitchen where the Cullens prepare their strict raw vegan diet:

This nubby-floored room is where they practice sliding into home plate:

Nobody knows what this room is for:

It is a mystery.

Found by: me

Loveliest comment, by Charlene: There must have been one heck of a sale on potlights at Rona in 2001, is all I’m sayin’.

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They Will Protect Me

Jun. 27, 2010

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funny real estate - They Will Protect Me

Included: washer, dryer, and vintage security system. Works in power failures! No phone line necessary! Not valid in all eras. Jousting wounds may not be covered by homeowner’s insurance.
Found by: Chris

Loveliest comment, by jocool: funny, it doesn’t say “horse property”.
funny real estate - They Will Protect Me

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Chairtuday! Honoring Chair the Way Chair Deserves

Jun. 26, 2010

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funny real estate - Honoring Chair the Way He Deserves

Throw a coin in, make a wish, and may Chair’s fortune smile upon you!
Found by: Joy

Loveliest comment, by K: I guess this is the rather public bidet at this third rate motel?

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Chairturday! CHAIRMX

Jun. 26, 2010

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funny real estate - CHAIRMX

Chair, stop! Wait! You forgot your helmet!

Found by: Claudio

Loveliest comment, by Lisa W: If I only had wheels. . .

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Dog Bomb

Jun. 25, 2010

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funny real estate - Dog Bomb

When I moved into my house, the previous owners helpfully left behind a folder with local take-out menus and the like. Seeing as they’d had two large dogs, I think a photo like this could’ve been useful, too — that way it might not have taken me over a week to track down all the deposits the dogs had left behind. Look! Right there! That’s one of his favorite spots.


Found by: Jesseh

Loveliest comment, by Stuart: Weichert Realtors, where finding you the perfect house is always Number Two. I mean One.

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