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(Warning: it’s all quiet and splashy and then suddenly someone says something VERY LOUDLY in German.)
Sorry, but today is Wednesday and this fish-confusing device is Not For Sale.
Question: Is this cruel to the fish? On one hand, a fish probably has terrible fear of heights and doesn’t have any clue how to get back down. On the other hand, a fish has, like, a five-second memory, and might forget that life hasn’t always been exactly like this.
Boo! It’s a bonus Chairturday! Bwa ha ha!
Sorry, but today is Wednesday and this Jonah-as-interior-decorator apartment is not for sale, as far as I know. You’ll have to make your own out of broken thermometers and Levenger lap desks.
Loveliest comment, by Anodean: Does it sound a xylophone scale as you walk up or down?
I was going to write a poem about how pelagically beautiful this is, but then the fish in the middle of the bookcase farted and distracted me.
(Sorry, but today is Wednesday and as far as I know this is Not For Sale.) (I am also sorry that I made a joke about fish farts. Some day I will become a less immature person, but it seems that day is not today.)
I know Chair’s always going on about how Burning Chair is such a life-changing experience, full of freedom and self expression and art and tribal community. But I always decline Chair’s invitations to head out there with all the Chairs; I just don’t want to see that many speeded-out Chairs, no matter how much chicken-wire and papier-mâché they wrap themselves in.
Found by: KT
Is it safe to come out? Eeek, no! *retreats*
How about now? Yikes! *retreats*
Vroom? Oh no! *retreats*
This commute could take a very… long… time.
(Sorry, but today is Wednesday and this easily startled car is Not For Sale, as far as I know.)
Oh you may not think me pretty,
But don’t judge on what you see,
I’ll eat myself if you can find
A smarter house than me.
You can keep your Italianates dark,
Your condos sleek and tall,
For I’m the Hogwarts Sorting House
And I can rent them all.
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